Sunday, May 31, 2009

THE Redneck Vacay

RNH and I finally decided Friday morning that we'd go camping at the beach. We loaded up the truck and 2.5 hours later, we were there. We camped at Carolina Beach State Park. Once there we picked out our campsite- #16. All of the campsites had a grill, tent pad, and picnic table with a water spicket and bathrooms (with showers) nearby. So it was pretty nice- almost like living at home!

We set up camp and changed into our bathing suits. We immediately set out for the beach. It was our first time at Carolina Beach- and let me say, I was pretty disappointed. You have to pay to park. Everywhere. No more Public Beach Accesses where you just find a good spot and enjoy the day. You have a meter to worry about. Booooo! So we put some change in the meter- whatever we had- and I set my phone alarm to go off when it was time to return to the truck. We could have stayed longer but we didn't have any more change!

Then we went to the Food Dawg (aka Food Lion) and picked up some goodies for the weekend. On the way back we saw a seafood store, so RNH just had to stop. We picked up a pound of fresh shrimp and some grouper. Once back at the site, we set up camp, started a fire and cooked our food. It was great and relaxing. We had a lil vodka to keep ourselves entertained and a good buzz going to sleep easier.

The first night was quite enjoyable except for a humongous thunderstorm that came ripping through. I was terrified and hung onto RNH for dear life. Him? Oh, he barely even noticed it and slept through it. It's good to know that our tent doesn't leak, and that RNH is a deep sleeper!

The second day we woke up and went for a hike. We checked out the intercoastal waterway, moved up to the marina, and then down through some other trails. At one point we came out into a parking lot where there were people gathering to go on a nature tour. We decided to join in because we had heard about the carnivorous plants in the area. Well, let me say this- it was AWESOME!!! We got to see the only place in the world where Venus fly traps grow in the wild! There were also pitcher plants. It was a very neat tour and we're so glad we "stumbled" across the tour!!! Totally worth the tour if you're at the park!

Venus Fly Traps- they only grow in the wild in Carolina Beach State Park!
Yellow Pitcher Plants. Very cool!

After our hiking adventure we came back, cooked lunch and left for another 1/2 day at the beach. This time we had scoped out a parking lot where we could pay $5 for the whole day. I didn't want to have to worry about feeding a meter, so we parked there. I guess this was the most popular public beach access because it was in front of the Pavilion. Now for you weirdos that hate the beach, or you damn yankees that only come here for your honeymoon or something- a Pavilion can be found at several beaches in the Carolinas. It is a place where you can eat hotdogs, funnel cakes, ice cream, play arcade games, ride fair rides, or buy one of the following items: any sort of body jewelry for one of your many body piercings, the trashiest t-shirts you wouldn't want your grandma to see you in, an alligator head, a shark in a bottle, a beach towel or chair, keychains, ugly picture frames that have the local beach's name stamped on it, or any other trashy memorabilia to help you remember the place you'd rather forget.


We walked down to the sand from the Pavilion area and saw a beach that was so crowded, we could barely find a place to sit down. Yesterday we were here and it was pretty quiet. Well- it turned out that we were about a 1/2 mile down. Oops. So instead we're stuck at this white-trash beach all day. What makes a beach, a white-trash beach you ask? Lets see...


About 75% of the people are morbidly obese- yup, that's right, you've got yourself plenty of "beached whales" to look at while you're trying to enjoy the ocean views. To make matters worse, the people usually wear the skimpiest bathing suits you can find on the market. I'm not sure where they get these suits, but they all must buy them from the same store. Most of them are drunk, despite the signs that say "Alcohol Prohibited" all over the place. I've been guilty of drinking on the beach myself, but there is a difference when you've got a bunch of people like me, and then a bunch of drunk beached whales. Ew, it is not a pretty sight! The other common denominator among these people is their mis-behaved children. The youngin's go crazy and throw sand everywhere. Its not an awww they're just too young and excited to be at the beach... because it gets worse as they get older. The older, pre-teens and wanna-be adults, hang out at the Pavilion. Most of the girls are wearing cut-off shorts and a skimpy bathing suit for their non-developed selves, and smoke cigarettes like they've been doing it all their life. They hang out in big groups and all have henna tattoos because they're so cool. And they drop the F-Bomb in front of little kids. Its all pretty amusing to watch. But then at the same time- you came to enjoy the beach, and its not easy with all of that going on!

Anyways- we had a good time at the beach despite the crowd and went back to shower for dinner. We drove about 15 minutes into Wilmington and ate at one of my favorite spots in the downtown Riverfront area, Dock Street Oyster Bar. RNH and I shared a platter for 2, clams, oysters, mussels, crab legs, shrimp, craw fish, corn and potatoes. It was DELISH! Then we walked around on the riverfront area and up and down the cobblestone streets. We got dessert at one of my favorite ice cream places- Kilwinns. They're to die for! We watched the sun set as we ate our ice cream.

I was enjoying the scenery when a pretty rough looking white lady came up to me on a bike. She asked if I'd take a picture of her and her hubby. They were celebrating their 21st anniversary. Of course I said yes. The lady's hair was a rat's nest, her face was beat red, she was wearing something that didn't match, she was riding a bike, and was drunk. Her husband pretty much fit the same description as his wife. I took the picture of them and made small talk. They were nice, but obviously a WRECK! So they left, rode their bikes down the boardwalk and got onto their MILLIONS-OF-DOLLARS YACHT. Yeah, awesome. Maybe I should have been nicer and tried to be their friends so we could get invited on their boat! Ha! I wish! Just shows... you never know who you're talking to!!!

The next morning we cleaned up camp, went into Wilmington on the way home and stopped at another favorite place of mine- Flaming Amy's Burrito Barn. Seriously some of the best burritos you've ever had! I miss being in the wilderness, so close to the ocean, and all of the good food! I wanna go on another redneck vacay soon!

1 comment:

  1. I should have told you that Carolina Beach is a little redneck! LOL
    - BHurst

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